a b a b c c d d e d E with an ending that can be either d d e d E or
c c d d e d E.
I’ve only written three poems in this style…and tweaked each try with my own add ons. The first attempt was a train wreck, the second was only a car crash and this one, which I continue to edit to this day. As you can see, I altered the rules, making the word She the first line of each stanza. I’m not going lie, it’s complicated, but if you’re up for the challenge, trying this form out will be its own reward.
This is my submission for the MONDAY POETRY POTLUCK...it's about a QUEEN I call...
She…
…is so fiery and hypnotic
that her glance can turn a glacier into a lake,
with a beauty that gives contusions to the eyes,
those beholding her sight may never escape.
The web of awe she weaves
is indescribable and hard to deny.
Divinity can't concoct a vision this grand,
nature jealous because second place is its command,
even the sun rises everyday to see,
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
She…
…is a scintillating narcotic,
who every milli-second I wish to take.
No other illicit drug could ever get me this high,
aching for her every moment I wake.
If she were to ever leave
a river I would most surely cry,
becoming a lost vagabond roaming the land,
so that this may never happen, here is my plan:
devote all my existence to thee,
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
She…
…is alluring and exotic,
curves, skin, and lips, flawless, no mistakes.
Fingers fighting to touch her; the battle ending in a tie,
exploration of her form soon to be caress’s fate.
Destined to one day achieve
a consummation that will cause the heavens to sigh;
two lovers who turn constellations into a fan,
of an endless connection that continually expands,
her vivaciousness expansive as the sea,
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
She…
…makes me neurotic,
whether asleep or awake.
Illusions and imagination of other things I dare not try,
gray matter could never function under this much weight.
To be this devoted, who would believe?
Mental faculties contorted and the same time spry.
The logic that's left assails to the lower stand,
joining erratic thoughts which are calmed by her hands,
an infatuation that has me giddy with glee;
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
She…
…the rest of my life to her allotted,
willful conscription to her I shall never break,
for when she is thirsty my mouth gets dry,
with eventual nuptials there can be no debate.
Into me essential breath she breathes,
I need her and that's no lie.
So we take a journey only fated lovers overstand,
her becoming a High Priestess and I the Iman,
letting the moments scribe our story,
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
She…
…at last bound together, we work on starting a clan.
Children soon to be everywhere, our own genetic caravan.
My soul the lock, her love the key;
this earthly inspiration born of ancient sands.
© 2008, 2010 dasuntoucha
Wonderful storytelling poetry at its best!
ReplyDeletebreath-taking piece...and while you're absolutely right about chant royal being intimidating, you make it look so easy. ...your humble fan... :)
ReplyDeleteOh, this is amazing...the last verse is exquisite! I admit to not knowing this style of poetry..delighted to have my horizons broadened. I will follow your example and give it a try, even if my first efforts are less than successful. Thanks for the inspiration, and thanks for stopping by my site...
ReplyDeleteI am awed at your mastery of this difficult form - too difficult for me to even attempt:) I tip my hat! Amazing.
ReplyDeleteI loved it the most for its fluidity ...every stanza. I guess this is what structures do to poetry. It maintains the rhythmic pulse.
ReplyDeleteIt is strange , the more I read about different poetry forms, the more I am reminded of my experimentation days in my teens.
Thank you for sharing!
Beautiful piece...love the ending there...
ReplyDeleteI like this line
ReplyDelete"curves, skin, and lips, flawless, no mistakes" because...while we all know that no such thing as perfection exists, when you find another so intoxicating, flaws become a non entity.
This form is daunting to say the least, but I really admire you for taking on not just one but a series of fixed poetry forms!
she is beautiful,
ReplyDeletein your words...
thanks for the treat.
Happy Monday Poetry Potluck!
breathtakingly portrayed an equally breathtaking beauty.. am I envious..??
ReplyDeletexox
This is beyond spectacular! I want to make a poster out of it and hang it on my wall!
ReplyDeletesuch a gift you have...I think I might try a Chant
Royal
wow!
ReplyDeleteOh my, this is poetry of the highest quality, I was reading it a 2nd time as I cannot get enough!!! I loved the last stanza...you have such amazing talent!! Thanks so very much for linking with Potluck, your support means so much to us!! Keep writing my dear friend xxx
ReplyDeleteWow. Good job telling a story within the confines of a challenging form.
ReplyDelete